a state, situation, or series of events involving interesting or intense conflict of forces
b : dramatic state, effect, or quality
Ok, so now we are clear on what “drama” is….in short it is life. I shall now explore what has become my “pet peeve”, my “eyeball” rolling moment in my day…..the thing I see on the net consistently…..”You post drama, and are surprised when people judge you?”
On the surface this seems like a pretty cut a dry statement, but let us look at this a little closer. As we have found out, drama, is LIFE….the good, the bad and the ugly; fair enough. If you post about the birth of a child, everyone congratulates you; but this is drama….why are we sending you our congratulations? Because we are happy for and your wonderful dramatic life event, Your child, spouse, family member is recognized for an act, promotion, move or award; once again congratulations. More drama, again I ask the same question. I suppose the same answer applies. It is the right thing to do, to take interest and feel excitement for these life accomplishments.
Let us move to the opposite end of the spectrum of drama, the death of a family member, friend, pet…….suddenly condolences……and in any civilized society, this is the correct and caring way to approach this subject….. to show the depth of our concern while someone is hurting, shattered, experiencing intense drama.
Then there is the grey area in between these two dramas, I will call it everyday life. Suddenly things can become a quagmire. There are those who will do everything in their power to decimate another with words, there will be those who are indifferent, and there are those who will try and help.
I want to talk about the “judge”
The judge……yes, the person who has all the answers to life, the ones who coined the phrase “attention slut”, a phrase I detest. The “judge” doesn’t want to hear about everyday life, or at least, anything that can be construed as bothersome….they are the “put on your big girl panties” gang, and get on with life. Not very “love your neighbour”ish, but the more you look at things, and study people, the more you realize we live in a world full of facades. Those who espouse their tolerance and love, very often are the ones who will cut you down at the knees. There will be the throwing around of, “I only surround myself with positive people,” but I do not know one single person who is positive 24/7, 365. We are all in this game called life, and sometimes it throws us some nasty curve balls, and it is at these times we need each other, we need compassion, we need advice, the judge can retire to chambers and call it a day.
I try to live my life remembering that I have no permission to judge anothers life, based on the fact, that it is not my life….plain and simple. Am I perfect in my attempt at this….no. Do I realize that I have done it, yes. Do I try to make amends when I have done it, yes. Am I under the illusion that it will not happen again…..no! I have and will continue to be judged, as will all of us, but perhaps if we looked into a statement and the emotion behind it, perhaps it may touch our hearts, perhaps instead of judging, we could be in part the helper. Perhaps instead of calling someone an “attention slut” or whatever other derogatory term the judge comes up with, we could see the pain of someone’s soul, looking for someone to help.
Enter the final piece of this equation, the internet. For good or bad, it is here to stay, and is the medium through which 99 percent of the world communicates, or doesn’t, but that is a whole other blog. At the end of our fingertips we have instant access to everyone and everything, and herein lays the “judge’s” playground. People vary with what they post on the internet, some share very little, some everything. For a moment, let us pull drama back into this equation. Now remember, drama is life, repeat, drama is life. The internet will never be a drama free zone, as what……drama is life, and life is drama, the good the bad and the ugly.
Those who chose to share very little are rarely criticized regarding their decisions. Those who chose to share their frustrations, battles, problems, are ripe for the picking by the “judges.” What is important here, is that people remember, not everyone is socially adept, and from behind computer screens evolves a world where these particular individuals are more at ease and able to speak about the above mentioned items. I am not sure why people feel it is their mission to belittle other people’s problems, perhaps it is a character flaw in the “judge.” Sometimes I read things that make me think, “that is a little too much,” but then I also think, “this is a cry for assistance of some kind.” We all don’t wear undergarments made of steel, they come in a variety of materials….not all are of the super hero version. What some can handle, others can not, we do not all have support networks surrounding us, and sometimes the advice or caring words of one person CAN make a difference.
I would rather take the road, that perhaps may help, that let’s someone know that someone cares and understands. I don’t question people’s motives for posting on the internet, sometimes we just don’t have the answers, and there are people who do. Sometimes we are so lonely and lost, we just need to know there is someone who cares. Sometimes we are so angry, that it is almost a complete mental release to type our anger out. There are so many examples of why people do what they do, with very logical answers…..yet, in today’s society it gets lumped into “drama slut”, let’s bring out the “judge” to shut this one down.
I myself, don’t want to be one of those people. In the internet age, everyone has a voice, and unless it is illegal or against my beliefs, I will never judge or ridicule one’s turmoil, pain, or confusion. We have the power to make lives better, with just a few words, just a few key strokes….how empowering is that? I think it is pretty darn impressive!
In the end, it is an individuals choice as to how to respond to anything they view on the net, but in my opinion there is enough bad out there already. Let us view drama/life for what it is, it’s easy, it’s hard, it’s joyful, and filled with sorrow, it’s everything in between. If we don’t like what we read, ignore it, let us take the high road, and like our parents taught us, “say nothing at all.” If we truly practice this in life, it should be just as easy to do in cyber space. We get enraged over bullying in real life, why is it acceptable when we use our words to bully over the internet?, ….Why?, because it is easy, so easy to be the “judge” when it is just us and a computer screen. Let’s retire the judge to chambers, take away his/her gavel and finally let’s empower each other through our words.
If you post this……..
Never post this…….
just a thought!!